As always.

I finally got around to scrubbing the bathroom. Ceiling, walls, tiles and floors. I just couldn't stand it anymore and had to make myself get it done.

I bought Jim a Christmas tree cookie jar. I also filled it with his favorite candy. So now he has a Christmas tree, and I don't have too feel bad about not going out and buying a real one or artificial tree. I am not a Christmas person. I think growing up in my family and all of the teasing and other nonsense ruined it for me. Plus Jim had to be the worlds worst gift giver. God love him, but he was an idiot in our younger days.

I know, I know Christmas isn't about gifts etc. I have heard it all, but when you go all year doing with out. You just want one day when you get something, anything, that you might like, or when someone asks you what your husband got you? That you don't have too say something like, he gave me, a mop and bucket. Then of course they have too show you the new diamond ring or what ever their loving husband got them. It was like my husband loves me more than your husband loves you. What ever. At least my floors are cleaner than your floors. So there, take that you witch. Hope you wind up in divorce court, and have too make a living scrubbing some one else floors.

Now when I look back it was all kind of funny in a strange sort of way. I would tell Jim what I wanted and he would give me some off the wall gift. I would write down my size for everything and he still could not get it right. So you can guess after all of these years, and all of the tears and yelling. He finally when I finally gave up on his gift giving. He went off and bought me this expensive ruby and diamond necklace. I just looked at it and didn't know what too say. I just kept thinking don't say anything, don't dig yourself a hole you can't get out of.

I know you think I am nuts, but I kept thinking why after all of these years. When I am old and don't give a shit about this sort of thing. You buy something like this for a gift. It wasn't about what a gift cost. It was about a gift too someone you love. All it ever had too be was something sweet and thoughtful. It could have been a single rose, or just a little love note. Just something that meant. I really do love you. Of course I know he loves me. I just wanted him too show me, and say it in a nice way.

I know we women are silly that way, but even if I am wrinkled, gray, and old. I still like too be told or shown that I am loved. I sure needed that when I was younger and had spent a day with dirty diapers and thrown up spit all over me. It is way too easy too take each other for granted.

Ros